We’ve just returned from a really fun holiday in Stockholm. I made notes whilst we were there so that I could document our experiences of taking Audrey abroad with no buggy.

Our previous experience of taking the kids abroad was stressful. We went to Portugal in 2024 and Audrey was bit under the weather when we left and by the end she clearly had tonsillitis and possibly something worse… we took her to A&E once we got back to the UK and sure enough, she also had pneumonia. She spent at least a week in hospital (funny how I now can’t remember how long precisely) and a very long time to fully recover. She has a very good memory, so when we booked this holiday she asked if going on the plane might make her poorly again.

I’m very relieved to say we all made it through the holiday in good health!

Things to note about Audrey and her SEND needs: she tires easily and doesn’t enjoy walking. She is, however, highly motivated by food. She loves a nice sit down somewhere. She doesn’t mind bus/train/boat journeys. She stims (hers is generally shaking her head) when she is having a good time and in times of stress. She needs to be reminded to drink and often avoids going to the toilet, but it’s important to make her go as she can also have those “I’m busting” moments when we are no where near a toilet! She can be a runner – she might walk off or hide from us as she gets a kick out of that and also thinks she’s old enough to do things alone. She loves chilling with a doll/book/film/snack. She can be a right grumpy moaner, have proper strops, be stubborn, annoying, but at the end of it all, be positive, happy and say she’s had a great day (especially if there was ice cream).

Day 1: my brother (who was house and dog sitting for us) drove us to Hove train station for a train to Gatwick airport at 10.50am, where by chance we bumped into friends so had a lovely chatty journey that passed quickly. We got to the airport and had lunch in Nando’s (somewhere we literally never eat but it worked well) and boarded our flight which left at 13.40. The flight was good, Audrey played with her doll, we played Dobble, all had a read and it went quite quickly.

We were picked up by a car (our air bnb host) at Stockholm airport and in just under an hour we were in our holiday home, at around 6.30pm. So that’s a decent full day of travel and Audrey was fine.

Our only other flight experience with Audrey was to Portugal, when she was poorly and weren’t sure at that stage if the queues and the hanging around and the travel were making her grumpy, but it as it turns out, it was probably just her illness as this time around she was pretty pumped!

Our holiday home is much bigger and nicer than we expected, Audrey is unsure of the stairs as they have gaps. The boys retrieve pizza for dinner, so we all go to bed very full and ready to start our adventure. The kids share a room with a double bed, which they weren’t initially keen on, but it goes ok.

Day 2: Audrey is up bright and early watching Trolls and eating toast. You’d think she would be tired but no. We were all eventually dressed about 10am and we go to play on the swing in the garden and check out the private jetty and the water with swans and ducks. It’s lovely and much warmer than the weather app implies it would be.

Although it’s only a 5 minute walk, Audrey is tired and annoyed that after the tiny activity we want to walk to the shop (10 mins there, 10 mins back). We talk her around on the promise of ice cream, but it’s tough going. She is pretty whiny. We return home for lunch and watch a movie. She says several times that we do not need to leave the holiday home.

The boys go for a swim in the very cold water and Audrey and I watch an insane amount of Bluey. When the joys return, Rex is thrilled by a small plastic toy horse Ted found in the water. We had just finished reading Warhorse as our bed time story, so Rex names the toy Joey. Ted cooks and we play Pass the Pigs. A very low key afternoon and evening in the hopes we replenish energy supplies for tomorrow.

Day 3: Ambitious. We all get up just after 6am and leave the house just after 7am for a bus and then the 7.50 ferry. It’s actually very cold on the ferry and we have not dressed accordingly. Our mission: pancakes. A big motivator for Audrey, but the walk from the ferry to the cafe was perhaps a little bit too much to ask. She gets annoyed by the walk (20 mins?) but we make it there and we enjoyed a good sit down and some excellent pancakes. Happy and ready for adventure, we get a train to our destination- Junibaken. A museum of famous literary characters. And we actually start with their little theme ride which was absolutely perfect. A sit down with a story and cute scenes to see. It was pretty magical. We also really loved the Moomin Valley play area with “snow balls” to throw. Audrey was still very tired though so we don’t stay there as long as we would like.

We leave to go for a nice sit down and a drink in the sun in what is probably quite a trendy sought after bar of an evening (the whole time we are there, we have an influencer in the wild moment with a woman posing constantly and flicking her hair).

Then we get a ferry to Gamla Stan and have a traditional Swedish lunch in a very friendly and cute restaurant. Rex is brave enough to order reindeer, Ted has moose and Audrey and I play it safe with meatballs. She enjoys them, but hates the lingonberries. Rex doesn’t enjoy his choice, but we are so proud he tried it. We head off for a meander through the beautiful streets and cute shops, this is made possible by Audrey (and Rex) having a pot of Ben and Jerrys. She is literally so focused on spooning ice cream in her face she does not question the walking or stopping to look in shops, which she usually hates. Train and a bus home and everyone is absolutely exhausted. It’s about 4.30pm when we get home and Ted heads off in search of alcohol (which isn’t freely available, you have to go to specialist shops) whilst me and the kids collapse. We eat leftovers for dinner, watch a movie and have an early night (9pm ish). Rex decides to sleep on the sofa as downstairs is much cooler than our upstairs rooms which are very warm.

Day 4: we know we pushed Audrey yesterday, so today we plan a quick local beach visit and a bus ride to the shops in Ekero. Audrey is really annoyed by the walk to the beach (even though it’s not very far) and she’s actually quite annoyed to even be there. We plonk her in the shade under a tree, Rex and I dip in and out of the cold water, Ted swims out to a jetty and dives off a board. Audrey cheers. She may not have wanted to be there, but ultimately she’s ok sitting down for an hour or so with her doll. One weird newish habit she’s started (that winds us all up) – she licks her dolls hair to smooth it down and style the hair. It’s not only gross (sometimes she fully licks her palm and fingers and then smooths the hair), it’s making the doll’s hair stinky. We have to accept it as she won’t stop and I assume this is a sensory/regulation tool and if it’s making her feel better and it’s not really harming anyone, we have to let her crack on.

We come home for hotdogs and more rest before a bus to the local the shops. This is not a particularly interesting part of Stockholm. We do a pick n mix from a sweet shop with a good selection, a supermarket run so we can actually eat vegetables and then home. Audrey is still complaining she’s tired. She also gets very grumpy and uncomfortable when she’s constipated and like a lot of us, struggles to be regular after travel.  I realise this is happening and that it is affecting her energy and mood. Side note: we have seen someone with Down’s syndrome pretty much everyday.

Day 5: we want to visit trendy Södermalm, starting with a fika stop at a hipster coffee shop that had nice buns but disappointing coffee. Audrey was already a reluctant walker, so it’s not long before we stopped again at a pretty tacky but perfect place with a jukebox, waffles and freak shakes. Rested and full, we continued to wander and thankfully stumbled upon a play park. Audrey loves a swing. I’m pleased we’ve had this moment, but always find it funny how happy kids can be in a basic playground. We are heading to the photograph museum, but it’s 12.30 and we pass a pizza place with good reviews, so to keep everyone happy we stop for lunch despite the ridiculous food they ate about an hour ago. Absolutely stuffed with pizza we walk to the Fotografiska and Audrey is really flagging. We are thrilled to discover when we get there that not only do they have a fabulous gift shop, but the current exhibition is a collection by none other than Martin Parr. An absolute fave of ours. Rex is inspired and spends his holiday money on a disposable camera. Audrey enjoys any chance to sit or lie down, so it’s handy there are options everywhere for her. It begins to be obvious she’s not just tired, but also constipated, which always puts her in a bad mood. But we push on. Ted has to carry her a bit. Our journey home feels hot and long. As soon as we get in we give her a big glass of cold juice and let her watch Spy Kids Armageddon. She is clearly very uncomfortable and she goes to bed early (8.30pm) after the relief of a small number 2. We watch a PG movie with Rex (Night Books) that has his classic fear in it – witches. He asks to sleep in with me and Ted sleeps downstairs on the sofa.

Day 6: up bright and early, but we keep the morning slow and Ted takes the kids to the jetty for a yoga session and he has a dip. We get a bus around 10.30am to see the royal palace which is only 30 mins away. A bright sunny day again, Audrey seems more positive when we set off (she managed another little number 2 in the morning). It’s not long before she’s struggling. The grounds are quite big and there’s no avoiding it takes some walking. We get a bus home around 2pm and have lunch and a movie chill time. A lot of wriggling and discomfort from poor Auds. Rex and I had a little visit to the jetty to dip our toes and then we had steak and chips for dinner. I share with Rex again even though he tends to whack me a lot in the night.

Day 7: another ferry trip in, nice and calm. At some point when we leave the house, Audrey alludes to the fact that she has hidden Rex’s horse, Joey. She has a habit of hiding things/chucking stuff out of windows so it’s not great news but she assures me she will return it when we get home (thankfully she has only just popped him outside on the windowsill and he is retrieved easily).

We head for what turns out to be our best fika with actual good coffee. We try to walk less for Audrey’s sake. We go to the Vasa Museum which is really impressive. And then we head to Bap (burger and pastrami) for lunch and it is perfect for our needs- delicious. We get home and it’s chill and packing before an early ish night ahead of our journey home. Side note: most days (because we are using public transport) we are faced with the stress of steps, escalators and either no lift, a broken lift or one that takes forever. Audrey has her moments, but she really bosses escalators (which can scare her) and she tackled some crazy staircases too.

Day 8: up at 6am and packing, cleaning up ready for a bus at 7.45am. It poured with rain and we were so early for our bus we just stood there getting soaked for 15 mins. Audrey hates rain but she coped really well. I guess she was happy to be going home. We were all damp and tired, so on the plane I pulled out the downloaded Bluey episodes to take the edge off the flight. Audrey was thrilled. She has shown that a flight is really no big deal to her, in fact, she holds my hand for the bits I don’t enjoy (take off and landing). 

We are all relieved when we finally get home around 3pm to see our crazy dog Barbara! The kids really missed her. It’s actually not long before Audrey finally has that much needed poo and all is well with the world again because she’s in her happy place: home!

Final thoughts: I have definitely glossed over some super-whining and some lifts/staircase/getting-off-buses-quick-enough stress. But on the whole it’s still a lesson that we have to push Audrey or we won’t get to experience half the things we want to. I know we will all look back so fondly on this holiday and the moaning will fade!

There were also a lot of moments where Rex seemed to think he had to parent Audrey or remind us to, which was interesting. He would be fretting over her walking just a short distance from us, or he lost sight of her with that panic moment of “where’s Audrey?!”. We actually had to tell him several times to chill out and let us get on with things.

I’m also starting to see what a rocky road the teen years will be. Audrey’s always been a child that shows “cheeky” behaviour, but we’ve also easily bent her to our will/turned that frown upside down. But lately I can see that her emotions are harder to control and she has upset and anger bubbling away that she can’t always get on top of. Plus she’s doing silly things (like the doll licking, toy hiding etc) that we don’t always know what the route is. She can’t always explain why she does what she does either.

How funny is it that she’s 13 and I am still Googling “How do teach a child with DS right from wrong?” And “what’s the best way to discipline a child with DS?”??