Upsetting news

I mentioned a few posts back that I was in touch with a woman who had prenatal screening that advised 99% that the foetus had Down’s Syndrome. I couldn’t offer her the perspective of someone who knew they were carrying a child with special needs, so I put her in touch with someone who could. Today we found out that she decided to terminate.

I am NOT saying she shouldn’t have terminated or that our input should have made her want to keep the baby, I’m just saddened that it’s so scary to have a child with special needs that there’s a way to opt out. I’m saddened that this is the norm. 92% of women who receive a prenatal diagnosis of DS, terminate and whilst I don’t know what it’s like to receive the news whilst pregnant, I do know what it’s like to feel like the diagnosis is the worst thing in the world and soon find out it’s not.

In this particular case, the woman in question met with several families, spoke to/emailed others… so she probably had more information than most before making the decision. I guess that’s really why I find the news so upsetting; even with support and positivity from the Down’s Syndrome community; she still felt she couldn’t keep the baby.

Whilst I know the decision wouldn’t have been taken lightly and I think she was very brave to contact DS families to help her and her partner make the choice, it still feels like we all failed to convince her it would be ok in the end.

This experience has made me more determined than ever to raise awareness and get people falling in love with Audrey. I hope our family can be a source of comfort, inspiration and hope for anyone wondering what life with a baby with DS is like.

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